I have always been rather socially awkward and knowing this makes me very self conscious about how I act in front of people, specifically people I do not want to be awkward in front of. Eventually I get over my issues and just become myself, but generally its too late and I get written off as weird or worse....boring. Now I believe I am pretty darn interesting and sometimes my social issues can be written off as "quirky" or even "cute" to a ridiculously small percentage of the human race, but to the few people I decide to "let in" this is rarely the case. So why is it that I cant just let loose and be all the Blakely I can be right off the bat instead of whatever it is I am? Well honestly if I could answer that question I would not be typing this now would I? I have been to a few therapists in my life time, not consistently mind you, but I like to believe telling some douche with a degree issues I know exist would not help. Not that psychologists are unable to help people, just not myself personally. So I attempt to get through life on my own, adjusting my attitude and tweaking my neurosis as I go. Now if only this would help me with the aforementioned meeting, and subsequent keeping, of new people in my life.
Whatever though, Netflix will never judge me. Hmm, perhaps I have stumbled upon my next Thankful Thursday....
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